Best Predictor of Future Behavior is Current Behavior.

Anyone who doesn't take truth seriously in small matters cannot be trusted in large ones either. Albert Einstein

The best predictor of your future behavior is your current behavior. Individuals will often say they did something because of a past incident. I think that is often a convenient excuse to avoid responsibility. Building on the concept of parallel process, what you are doing in the current moment reflects what you will do in the future. How you approach even the small things gives insight into how you will address the big things. In examining your approach you can find your motives, desires, dreams, thinking errors, excuses, and payoffs that you seek. In the discussion on integrity, it isn’t your past deceit that is a concern, but the current deceit. It is important to be open and honest about what is going on in the moment. If you’re lying about the small things now, my guess is you’ll lie about the big things in the future. If show courage in examining the small things now, you’ll show courage in addressing the big things that will occur in the future. How you change your behavior now will tell others you will change your behavior in the future. The past is the past (which doesn’t mean you get to ignore it). All you have is what you are doing in the now. When you say I did this because of “________,” you rob yourself of an opportunity to make changes the current moment. The things you avoid will be the same things you avoid in the future. As you move forward in the workbook, how you address the assignments will give insight into how you will shape your recovery. When you transcend your small barriers, you’ll be able to transcend the big barriers.

Topic 12: Behavioral Analysis

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Clients often report they don’t know why they did what they did. And to a large degree, I believe them. I often challenge my clients to tell me the steps necessary to drive a car. As they do, I playfully trip them up by asking questions about this or that. What they come to realize is that driving a car is a remarkably complex task that calls for multiple thought processes and requires you need to pay attention to details. In psychology, this term is called “automaticity:” the ability to complete complex behaviors without active cognitive thinking –like a habit. Much of the ritual in Internet sexual compulsivity is automatic. People fall into a trance, and simply don’t know why they are doing what they are doing. A helpful tool in identifying thinking errors, feeling triggers and high-risk situations is the completion of a behavioral analysis. This is a step-by-step examination of what happens in an acting-out experience. The goal is to help you identify additional relevant issues, so you should examine all details, no matter how small you think they are. The behavioral analysis is a way to slow down and uncover the contributing factors. In the process of completing the analysis, you will identify a number of places to intervene and interrupt the cycle.
• You will learn to recognize and then contradict thinking errors. Challenging negative thinking through corrected thoughts or using affirmations (if you are familiar with the 12-step tradition) is a start.
• You will be able to address your feelings. Identifying ways you can connect with others in a healthy way, for example, allows you to help address feelings of loneliness. If your sadness and depression are significant and long lasting, medications or therapy might be helpful.
• High-risk situations are recognizable. Too much free time can make you vulnerable to a high-risk situation. Finding ways to engage in healthy fun is another way to intervene on the cycle.
In each of the behavioral analyses, I talk about an escalating pattern of behaviors that sets the stage for the next trip through the cycle. When working with clients, I call these trips “micro-cycles,” because you may experience multiple trips through the cycle within a given time period. The example below highlights multiple ways you may have failed to cope with the setups throughout a given time period. The key then is to identify ways you can interrupt any and all of the various parts of the cycle.
Assignment
• Using the template below, complete a behavioral analysis of an acting-out encounter. What feelings triggers (see page XX) thinking errors (see page xx) or high-risk situations (see page xx) did you identify? Update the current lists, as appropriate.
Instructions
To complete the analysis, it may be helpful to work backwards. Start with the acting-out incident. Answer the question “What happened?” Then ask, “What happened right before that” and so on. Stay focused on what happened while you work backward. Don’t give up to early, but you can always add more if you remember parts of the cycle. It’s like tracing the last domino’s fall back to the first domino. Once you have a good start at what happened, complete the other columns by adding the corresponding thinking errors/thoughts, feeling triggers and high-risk settings. Try to fill each column, but if you can’t you can always come back to it. At the end of the process, summarize the behavioral analysis. Every item in the analysis becomes a place to develop an intervention plan.
---Start Here---
What happened?
Include Payoffs or Consequences Thoughts
What was I thinking?
What reason did I use?
Feelings
What was I feeling? High-risk Situation
When, where, who, what?
I hooked up with someone I did it again. Shame.
Hopelessness. Isolation. Avoid my support network.
Late night
No support
I drove over to their place He/she is attractive. Sex will be great.
Why do I keep doing this? Excited, happy, numb, distracted. Going to other peoples house.
Not establishing boundaries.
No support network
Keeping secrets
I was chatting online Maybe I can connect with someone.
My partner is already asleep, no one will know.
My partner isn’t available Lonely, excited, aroused Cruising.
Online late
Online in “bad” places
I start looking at porn. No one will know
It’s only pictures
I earned it after how bad today was. Justified, entitled,
Bored No supervision online.
Porn sites
I was checking my email I have to see what else needs to be done on the project. Lonely, tired, sad. Working too late
Using work to give me an excuse to use the internet
“Work-aholic”
I was heading to bed Can’t talk to anyone.
I’m alone.
No one cares Sad, depressed, lonely, tired. Isolation.
Tired
Overworked
I had a fight I can’t do anything right.
My partner doesn’t understand.
It’s my fault Fear, sadness, shame, guilt. Seeing someone angry.
Conflict
Lack of assertive skills
I missed dinner My partner doesn’t care; he/she didn’t’ wait for me. Hungry Not eating well
Not keeping a schedule
Life not in balance
I come home late I had to get this project done.
Maybe my boss won’t be mad at me if I’m done.
It’s not a big deal. Stress
Guilt/Shame
Fear Working late
Not keeping a schedule
Trying to please others.
I had a project to complete at work. Oh no. I’m in trouble.
I should know better.
I have to do it myself.
No one will help.
It has to be done today.
I’m going to get fired. Worried, anxious.
Stress Made a mistake.
Not talking with others.
Not being honest.
Isolating.
Not asking for help.
Lots of conflict at work. Better be careful or my boss will turn on me.
I’d better not screw up. Worried/fearful that someone is angry.
Shame/Fear Someone is angry
Conflict
Consequences at work.
My boss yelled at me. I did it again
I’m in trouble
I can’t do anything right.
I told myself I wouldn’t do that again. Tired.
Fearful
Shame/Guilt Conflict
Doing things I said I wouldn’t
I came in late because I overslept Frustrated that I didn’t sleep well.
I did it again Tired. Hooking up the night before (complete and/or continue the analysis)
Summary of the analysis Catastrophizing.
Minimizing.
Justifying.
Blaming.
I can’t make a mistake.
I’m in trouble.
I can’t tell anyone.
I’m going to get fired.
I’m alone. Lonely.
Guilt.
Tired.
Worried.
Anxious.
Fearful.
Sad.
Depressed.
Lonely.
Shame.
Hopelessness.
Excited.
Stress. Not sleeping well.
Making a mistake.
Isolation.
Being online.
Working from home.
Working late.
Overwork.
Drinking.
Cruising.
Chatting online.
Looking at porn.
Conflict.

Behavioral Analysis of the Acting out Cycle

A helpful tool in identifying thinking errors, feeling triggers and high risk situations is the completion of a behavioral analysis. This is a step-by-step examination of what happened. The level of detail is on the minutia. The goal is to help identify additional relevant issues to be addressed. I often challenged my clients to tell me how to drive a car. As they do, I will playfully trip them up by asking questions about this or that. What they come to realize is that driving a car is a remarkable complex task, with multiple cognitions, and items to be aware of. psychology the term is automaticity: the ability to complete complex behaviors without active cognitive thinking. Much of the ritual in sexual compulsivity is automatic. The behavioral analysis is a process to slow down and uncover the contributing factors. The following table is helpful.

What happened	Thoughts	Feelings	High Risk Situation
Woke up tired/Didn’t sleep well	Frustrated that I’m not sleeping well	Tired	Not Sleeping Well
Went to work		Tired
Boss angry (and not even at me)	Better be careful or she’ll turn on me. I better not screw up	Worried Fearful that someone is angry
I make a mistake	Oh no. I’m in trouble now. I should know better. I can’t tell anyone. I’m going to get fired.	Worried/Anxious	Made a mistake Not talking with others Not being honest
I hide the mistake	Maybe they won’t find out	Paranoid/Fearful again	Lying
Boss mad at me	I can’t do anything right.	Fear/Sad/Shame/Guilt
I shut down	Can’t talk to no one. I’m alone	Sad, depressed, lonely, tired	Isolating
I head over to the bar after work	Maybe I can meet some of my friends	Lonely, tired. Sad	Bar setting
Drink too much	At least I won’t feel anything for a while	Relaxed/calm	Drinking
Start Cruising at the bar.	Maybe I can connect with someone.	Lonely. Excited	Cruising behaviors
Bring someone home. Unsafe Sexual contact (no condom).	Wow. He/she is attractive. Sex will be great.	Excited. Happy. Numb Distracted	Unsafe Sex Not establishing boundaries.
Wake up tired	Frustrated that I did it again

Summary of the analysis	Catastrophizing Minimizing I can’t make a mistake I’m in trouble I can’t tell anyone I’m going to get fired I’m alone	Lonely Tired Worried Anxious Fearful Sad Depressed Lonely Excited	Not sleeping well Making a mistake Isolating Being in a bar Drinking Cruising Unsafe Sex

In the process of completing the analysis, you now have a number of places to start intervening to stop or interrupt the cycle. Learning to recognize and then contradict thinking errors is part of this process. Challenging negative thinking through corrected thoughts, or affirmations if you’re familiar with the 12-step tradition is a start.

Addressing the feelings are important. Identifying ways that you can connect with others in a healthy way allows you to help address feeling lonely. Perhaps if the sadness and depression is significant enough, and long term enough, medications or therapy might be helpful. Finding ways to engage in healthy “sober” fun is another way to intervene on the cycle.

In each of the high risk behaviors, I talk about an escalating pattern of behaviors that sets the stage for the next trip through the cycle. Working with clients, I call this a “micro-cycle” which suggests that the whole day can be a cycle, but in each attempt to cope or failure to cope, I engaged in a pattern of unhealthy behaviors. The key then is to identify ways that you can interrupt any and all of the aspects of the cycle addressed in this chart.