Identifying the transforming values of your life.

Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony. (Gandhi)

A task toward sexual health is to define the values by which you want to live your life. It is done in community/connection with others. The process of clarifying your values, and the behaviors consistent with those values is the experience of discovering your truth. My experience suggests an individual is much more successful when their life that reflects their truth. For some individuals, discovering or naming their internal truth is asking a blind man to describe a color. Due to shame, guilt, fear, failure, or any number of reasons, many individuals cannot name the most important values in their life that truly represent their core.

Paradoxically, others can be the source of the primary values in your life. What we like and dislike in others reflects our inner core. Briefly, that to which we are drawn reflects an inner craving that we must address. That which we reject reflects an inner craving that we must address. Transference is a tool where you can recognize what is most important in your life. You can recognize these values by identifying various pivot points in your life. It is in these pivot points where we get a sense of something more in our life. In the pivot points a person experiences awe, amazement, horror, beauty which can be used to connect with others. The experience is rewarding, but isn’t always easy. Sometimes these are values that we have and want to express more; or, it may be values we don’t have and want to obtain.