Repression is to live a life that you were not meant to live. Repression is to do things you never wanted to do. Repression is to be fellow that you are not, repression is a way to destroy yourself. Repression is suicide – very slow of course, but a very certain slow poisoning. OSHO
Another quote from a book I’ve been reading.
The last line of the quote struck me. “Repression is suicide – very slow of course, but a very certain slow poisoning.” This is no truer in the realm of sexuality. I can not remember how many times I’ve worked with people who are experiencing a slow death because of the repression of their sexual energy. I can’t help but think of my work in chemical dependency as a way to avoid the pain of this slow death. The shame, fear, hurt, and guilt are the consequences of this repression.
What would it look like if you ended your own repression regarding your sexuality? How might life be different? How might you be different? How would your relationships be different?
I believe that one of the best interventions is to simply affirm the possibility of the individual to be who he or she is. I don’t give permission; rather the individual has within him or her own being the inherent permission to the core in all areas. Given my focus, this includes being alive in the realm of sexuality. It is stepping beyond the repression to affirm you wants, needs, and desires. Sometimes this will be easy; often it will be a bit of work.
OSHO (1999) Emotions: Freedom from Anger, Jealousy and Fear. OSHO International: New York.
This is currently available as a free kindle ebook on Amazon. (The kindle version is no longer free, updated 11/16).
Sunday, November 7, 2010
What is sexual health?
“You simply remain authentic: you don’t know what is good and what is bad, you don’t know what is positive and what is negative. You are simply authentic. This authenticity will allow you to have a glimpse of the real.” OSHO
What is sexual health?
There are an abundance of formal definitions of sexual health. And still, what is sexual health? The quote reflects the key to sexual health in my opinion. It is simply authenticity. It is neither good, nor bad, simply authentic. And it is YOUR authenticity, not what you think others think should be authentic to you. Yes, that reads awkwardly, but the key is to focus on your authenticity. Clients will often worry about what family, friends, partners, and others think is important that they loose their voice.
Authenticity is more than simply doing what you want when it comes to sexuality; it is engaging in behaviors that express the core of who you are. The key for me is the core; your heart of hearts. From that core, sexual health is authentic.
OSHO (1999) Emotions: Freedom from Anger, Jealousy and Fear. OSHO International: New York.
This is currently available as a free kindle ebook on Amazon. (The kindle version is no longer free, updated 11/16)
What is sexual health?
There are an abundance of formal definitions of sexual health. And still, what is sexual health? The quote reflects the key to sexual health in my opinion. It is simply authenticity. It is neither good, nor bad, simply authentic. And it is YOUR authenticity, not what you think others think should be authentic to you. Yes, that reads awkwardly, but the key is to focus on your authenticity. Clients will often worry about what family, friends, partners, and others think is important that they loose their voice.
Authenticity is more than simply doing what you want when it comes to sexuality; it is engaging in behaviors that express the core of who you are. The key for me is the core; your heart of hearts. From that core, sexual health is authentic.
OSHO (1999) Emotions: Freedom from Anger, Jealousy and Fear. OSHO International: New York.
This is currently available as a free kindle ebook on Amazon. (The kindle version is no longer free, updated 11/16)
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Sex, Shame, Fear, Recovery, Hope, Life
I was keenly reminded how difficult it is to talk about sexual health issues in general and sexual compulsivity in particular. For many individuals, the first steps toward discussing sexual issues are shaped by shame, embarrassment, fear and guilt. I can not stress enough how NORMAL these feelings are when opening up a new area of growth. While it is easy to say, I also know how many of these thoughts and feelings are irrational, based in cultural messages that “sex is bad,” and a general aversion to addressing sexuality.
Even though these reactions are normal, I’m also aware how important it is to start the process of talking about your sexual health concerns. My experience suggests that sexuality is at the core of many of the most important aspects of our life. For many people in recovery, sexuality is the last issue to be addressed. At the same time, it is often the last issue counselors want to (and in some causes are trained) to address.
In almost every situation when someone starts the process of addressing sexuality, the reaction eventually has been positive. The energy “protecting” the shame is released allowing the energy to be directed toward life giving actions. New possibilities are created allowing the individual to life a new life.
What do you need to start the process?
Even though these reactions are normal, I’m also aware how important it is to start the process of talking about your sexual health concerns. My experience suggests that sexuality is at the core of many of the most important aspects of our life. For many people in recovery, sexuality is the last issue to be addressed. At the same time, it is often the last issue counselors want to (and in some causes are trained) to address.
In almost every situation when someone starts the process of addressing sexuality, the reaction eventually has been positive. The energy “protecting” the shame is released allowing the energy to be directed toward life giving actions. New possibilities are created allowing the individual to life a new life.
What do you need to start the process?
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